How to feel (and appear) more confident
No one - and I mean no one - feels confident 100% of the time, no matter how it may seem from the outside.
Our nerves can sometimes take the better of us, especially when presentations, new clients, or challenges are about, and it is crucial we know how to deal with that so we don’t destabilize completely in these situations.
One way of doing this is to gather up all the confidence you can muster before you head into a high-pressure scenario, so you step into it feeling stronger and aware.
Today, I will "talk" about some effective techniques you can use to become more confident, keep your cool, and look more self-assured in the process too.
Be useful and get things done
One famous psychiatrist in Brazil, Italo Marsili, often says that confidence comes from being useful and getting things done in the best way you can.
It makes much sense, as sitting at home in our pajamas or procrastinating while staring at a huge to-do list will hit hard on our self-esteem and energy level, right?
At the same time, looking back at everything you’ve accomplished, your victories, and your journey - even the little steps you take every day - can give you that much-needed boost in confidence and pride.
So, let’s get up and get things done!
Work your way up, even if it is one tiny bit at a time, and even if today it means only organizing your workspace, cleaning your house, or helping your children with their homework.
At your job, deliver a service you'll be proud of, be helpful to your colleagues, and try to learn from your mistakes.
At the end of the day, when you look back, you will feel joy and confidence for having been useful and productive.
Work on your “power pose”
Psychologist Amy Cuddy has one of the most-watched TED talks, where she speaks about how our body and posture influence the way we feel, and even our hormone levels, which have a direct connection to our emotions.
Making a power pose (yes, the one like superman!) before a big presentation, sitting up straight, and holding your head high during a difficult meeting can go a long way in giving you that extra power boost and much-needed energy.
Keeping eye contact with your counterpart or audience conveys much confidence, too.
Try it out and let me know! :)
Invest in your appearance
Style is about how we show up to the world, and it has a huge influence on us holding our heads higher.
Our appearance is undoubtedly one of the essential parts of our glow, and in us feeling self-assured.
Being so, whenever you are preparing for something challenging, always take a quick look in the mirror and make sure:
That you’ve dressed appropriately for this specific occasion, thinking about the dress code and who you will be talking to.
That you’re conveying the right messages, aligned with your personality and objectives. Never forget that your outfit speaks volumes about how you wish to show up for a situation!
That your clothing & accessories fit and flatter you just right, without making you self-conscious, being too tight, or too baggy.
That everything you’re wearing is clean, in good condition, and that you’re looking polished and elegant in your authentic way.
Last, but not least, make sure that you’re feeling beautiful, happy, and have that confident look in your eyes. You know the one I mean! :)
I do this every day and can assure you: it makes all the difference in the way I approach my job, career, and life.
Exercise your mindset
I once heard a coach say that “confidence is a mindset skill—one that you can develop and strengthen just like you would any muscle.”, and I couldn’t agree more.
A mindset of confidence is not made in lack of fear but in our willingness to act and persevere regardless of it.
It’s maintained in the trust that we can - and will - figure it out, even if it takes starting again to come out on top at the end of the day. it’s in trusting yourself, your journey and skills, and knowing deep down you are right for the job, even when some impostor syndrome might appear in your mind sometimes.
This mindset, as self-awareness, is not something that we just snap a finger and get, but a skill that we have to exercise every day, so it gets easier and easier throughout our lives.
Smile!
I’m a smiler by nature, but I totally get it if it doesn’t come that naturally to you.
As with the confidence mindset, a self-assured and natural smile is also something you can exercise and learn that can go a long way in creating a feeling of contentment within yourself and for others. It tells your brain that you are comfortable and secure, and this conveys to the people around you too.
Without a doubt, a beautiful smile lightens up the mood in the room, creates connection, and boosts your confidence level in all situations that might come your way.
-
Now that you have some tools in hand, I hope you use them to boost your confidence levels. One step at a time, consistently, can take you a long way!
Put some of these in action and let me know what you feel in the comments below.
Hope to see you here again soon,
Roberta Carlucci